Words of LOVE

~ It is not how much we do, but how much LOVE we put in the doing.

It is not how much we give, but how much LOVE we put in the giving.

~ I am a little pencil in the hand of the writing God who is writing a love letter to the world.

~ Like Jesus we belong to the world, living not for ourselves but for others. The joy of the Lord is our strength.

~ Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies.

狂风暴雨中

在面对重重的难关，繁重的功课及考试的压力时，
要记得主耶稣的同在会陪我走过这场狂风暴雨。
期待看见，雨后出现的彩虹，漂亮地出现在晴朗的空中。

Happy Nurses Day

12/5/2010 (Wednesday)

Hands that turn caring into action;

Touch that turns compassion into comfort;

Smiles that turn love into healing...

Happy Nurses Day to all the nurses!!!

Good listener

31/3/2010 (wed)

just now in class, Dr KG mentioned the "trust" element in nurse-patient communication. he asked us, how can you let patient build the trust on you? we gave all sorts of answers... but non of of us got the right one.

the answer is a very simple one - showing patient that you are interested. the primary and also an important element in communication. if you didn't show any interest, how can you expect people to develop the trust in you?

when he told us the answer, i was like "oh yea!!!" *knock on my head* i think i left out this most of the time. the essential element to become a good listener. not only towards patients, and also people around me especially friends... i think i always lost my patient while people is talking to me on something i am not interested in, and i definitely do show it in my non-verbal communication. gotta learn how to become a good listener...

lesson of the day: remember to show that i am interested while communicating.

下雨了

30/3/2010 （星期二）

刚才放学走出学校时，天空在下着雨。
讨厌下雨的我，望着乌云密布的天空，
在想：为什么偏偏在我放学要回家的时候下雨呢？

可是感谢主，包包里躺着新买的雨伞，
让我在走去停车场的路途上不会变成“落汤鸡”。
路上下着倾盆大雨，模糊了我的视线，也看不到前方的路。
感谢主，让我平安的到家。
当小白经过一滩滩的积水时，轮胎在水上滑了开去。
感谢主，让我捉稳了驾驶盘。
在下车时被雨水淋了个湿透透，
感谢主，我马上可以舒服的洗个热水澡。
当我最害怕的闪电和打雷都到齐时，
感谢主，袮的同在让我不至于怕到躲在被窝里叫自己快点睡觉。^^

虽然下雨为我带来了许多不便，
然而，还是要感谢主。
因为今晚天气将会是凉凉的，让我能够睡个好觉。=D

速度

30/3/2010 （星期二）

今天早上和往常一样，和亲爱的小白一起出门去上课。
当我离开家，下到高速公路时，就被长长的车龙围绕着了。好塞车噢！
平时路上都是缓慢行驶，今天终于让我遇到不会动的车龙了。

塞车的当儿，无聊的我只好东看看，西望望。
原来路边也有好多美丽的景色呢。
路边长着各式各样的树，高高在上的，或是矮矮的灌木。
有些被修成了波浪形，正方形。
还有像螺丝般，可爱的旋转形。

从来没有发觉到每天必经之路有那么多可爱的东西。
也许每天只顾着踩油门，专心在看路。
不怪得妈妈常说，当你将速度放慢的时候，
将会发觉到许多平时都不察觉的事物。

自从开课以后，时间表都排得满满的。除了上课，还有实习。
不知不觉已将生活的步伐加快。也许就这样错过了许多美好的事物和恩典。
在加快步伐的当儿，偶尔放慢速度，或停下开看看，
可能会有意外的收获呢。^^

我们的友谊

21/3/2010 （星期日）

我们曾经无所不谈，
我们曾经有共同的话题，东南西北，讲个不停。
我们曾经说好要一起逛街，逛书局，看红鹤。
我们也曾经拥有一样的协议，共同的理念。
还曾经拥有一段珍贵的友谊。

曾经在大家开心时，互相分享。
曾经在大家遇到困难时，互相分担。
曾经在大家经历失败时，互相鼓励。
曾经在大家情绪低落时，互相安慰。
曾经在大家遇到挫折时，互相扶持。
曾经在大家有需要时，互相用祷告托住对方。
曾经在大家有需要时，成了对方的小天使。

可是，那次以后，我们不再详谈，也不再彼此问候，关心。
我们之间，有了隐形的隔膜。
虽然大家有没有说出口，
但是，大家都感受到那道墙的存在,
将我们所培养的默契，间隔住了。

后悔自己相处得太诚实。
后悔让自己太依赖朋友。
后悔让友谊占了重要的地位。
后悔让自己太看重这段友谊。

因为，我发现，我已经渐渐地失去了它。

恼怒自己，连一段友谊，都无法维持。

Happy day

18/3/2010 (Thu)

yeah! finished pharma paper today and feeling extremely happy.
is like letting a burden down on my shoulder. huh...
not gonna think about the result first.. ^^

people says that happiness spreads...
and i am calling friends in my contact list to "spread" the happiness.
this is what call sharing right? =D
is better to spread happiness rather than diseases... haha..
but people begin to ask am i ok? is there anything wrong with me? =.=
i thought this is the way that we suppose to lead our life,
rejoice in the Lord always!

this shows me how dull i am usually.
when i am happy, people will start asking why am i so abnormal.
gonna learn how to rejoice in the Lord...
You are my source of strength and happiness
my day won't be so wonderful without You!!

"The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you;
he will never leave you nor forsake you.
Do not be afraid; do not be discourage."

~ Deut 31:8

选择

这个主日负责帮忙师母在主日学里伴唱。
刚才到教会正等待主日学开始时，爱伦姐走了过来。
她问了一个令我蛮惊讶的问题。
她说：“Ivy，你有兴趣教主日学吗？负责四，五及六年级的学生。”
哇！好大的责任噢！
其实，负责高班的弟兄正在修博士学位，所以他时常在礼拜天要去上课。
可怜的孩子们只好和低班的学生合班。正好我刚到信义会，所以就瞄中了我。

话说回来，上个主日负责少年团及敬拜赞美的姐妹也找了我谈。
希望我抽空帮忙教会少年团的事工，
也告诉我她已经将我编排在敬拜赞美的轮值表里了。=D

其实，对我来说，主日学或少年团都是很好的事奉岗位。
在母会事奉时，都有机会在这两个事工当中服侍。
坦白说，我对少年人的事工会比较有负担。
也许自己不太喜欢孩子吧。看到孩子们调皮时，会拿他们没办法。=(

在还没答复两位姐妹之前，想让自己有一点时间想想和祷告。
记得以前在少年团当职员时，
导师说过：一旦参与，就要负起全部的责任，尽心尽力去做。
因为我不止对要孩子们，少年人，教会负责，最重要的是必须对神负责任。
所以绝对不能马马虎虎。

求主在我面对选择时，加给我聪明智慧。
是袮最了解我的能力，恩赐。也是袮最清楚，我能胜任哪一个岗位。
期盼着，袮的引导。

一句话

最近这几个星期，家里发生了一些事情。但是我一直都在忙，
直到今天才稍微的了解事情大来龙去脉。

大家都一直在为这件事争执，爷爷，奶奶，姑姑们，
大家都不甘示弱，各持己见，赞成的赞成，反对的反对。
就因为大家的一句话，把当事人弄得团团转。
回电邮，接响的不停的电话。
除了要面对自己，工作的压力，还有大家的意见。

别人说的一句话，也许能提醒我们一些被忽略的事，
可是，当听的太多的时候，连自己的立场也会被动摇。
原以为一件美好的事，在大家一句话的“洗礼”下，也会变得非常的丑陋。

对我而言，人都长那么大了，绝对有权利为自己的事做决定。
虽然听取大家的意见是好的，但毕竟选择权是在你手上。
当然，到最后，你也要为着你的决定负责。
可是，只要衡量过，觉得事情是值得你去做，不会后悔的话，就放胆去吧。
只要你不愿意，没有人可以阻止你为你的人生涂上美丽的色彩。

*******

深深的体会到“人言可畏”这句话。
《圣经》说：一句话说得适宜，就如金苹果掉在银网子里。
深愿你我所说的话，能成为别人的祝福。


p/s：whatever it is，我都会支持你。。。

Still

down in the valley again, i fell.
was pulled up, but and now i am pushed down again.
there are lightnings and thunders deep down in the valley,
and the storm is kinda scary...

Lord,
please hide me under Your wings,
and cover me with Your mighty hand.
because i know, no one can hurt me,
when i am under the shelter of Your wings.

God,
i want to soar with you, above the storm,
there will be peace high up in the sky.
please don't leave me alone,
as i may not be able to struggle through the disaster alone.

I will be still, knowing You are God.

Pack schedule

huh, haven't written anything for such a long time. because why?? i am having exams all the way long. they had started to torture me since 2nd of March and will continue to appear in my calender until April.. scary...

at first is A&P, then HA and Pharma, then A&P again. after that will be English, Mirco & Para, CM and at last mock OSCE before going out for clinical all in one week.. haih, still got a lot of stuff to be covered. and i just screw up my A&P paper this tuesday. T.T

well, stop thinking things in a negative way. have to be self-motivated. come on, i am a uni student already. not gonna depend on teachers, mummy or friends to motivate me like last time. is time to grow up now.

but i know Jesus is with me... he is the one who always know me the best and the difficulties that i am facing. although i only will remember Him when i need Him. =p i remember that he did said : My grace is sufficient for you. this is such a cool promise that given by God. to me, now is a very good situation to "claim" the promise. haha =)

ok, don't procrastinate anymore. is time to continue working....

情人节里的玫瑰花

情人节这个季节，到处都可以看见花店及花商们摆卖着的花束。
每当经过时，都会忍不住，
停下脚步来欣赏五颜六色，被包扎得非常精致花朵。
有些甚至还配上可爱的泰迪熊和巧克力呢。

闻着淡淡的玫瑰花香，我想：到底漂亮的花儿可以绽放多久呢？
小心照顾的话，顶多只能生存一个礼拜左右。
一个礼拜后，仙女般的花儿就要凋谢了。
花瓣一片一片的变成了黄褐色，然后一片一片的掉落。
实在是不忍心看着漂亮的花朵在转眼间凋谢，被逼从大家的焦点中挪去。

亲爱的花儿能在有限的生涯里，尽力带给情侣们甜蜜与欢笑。
有点像《圣经》里所说的“做盐发光”，
我是否也能像那些美丽的花儿，在有限的生涯里为主作盐发光呢？

这一路上，感谢有你。。。

你是我的天使，无论我面对任何难题，你总是用你的羽翼守护着我；
你是我的港湾，无论我面对什么挫折，你永远等候着我靠岸歇息；
你是我的灯塔，当我迷惘失措时，你必照亮前方领我走出黑暗；
你是我的指南针，当我彷徨迷失时，你无时无刻都为我指引方向。
这一路上，感谢有你。。。

勇敢走出去

新的一年，新的开始，也有了新的目标。希望这首歌能成为我的目标，祷告，也是对神的呼求。希望我在生活中能够成为别人的祝福，将神的爱带到人群中。

自从第一次听到这首歌，就打从心底爱上了它。感觉上它贴切地说出了我一直以来的心声。这几天它也一直出现在我的脑海里，挥之不去。。。

《勇敢走出去》

我并不完美，也并不特别
而祢却是为我舍弃生命的主
我时常软弱，有时会迷惑
但祢是道路真理和生命

主祢要往哪里走，我就跟祢走
领我走到世界尽头，一生不再回头
让世界听到我们敬拜，我们的祷告
让复兴从我们开始，将主爱带到人群中

纵然有许多的问题，我也不放弃
祢大能赐给我勇气，我会勇敢走出去

Expectations

well, MUET result is out. i didn't did up to my expectation. i aimed for band 5 but i only get a band 4. although i didn't get the mark analysis yet but some how it disappoints me. sometimes i am thinking am i aiming too high but at the mean while do not have the ability to achieve it? am i over expecting my talent? or i did not put enough hard work to achieve my goal?

sometimes i really feel disappointed with myself. why i can't be the one that saying i am the best? why i am the one who always be in the second rank? not only academically but also in everything i do. nowadays, people will only focus on the best person. like patients seeking for doctor's advice, they will always want or request for the BEST doctor to treat them instead of the second-good one. people's main concern are "who is the best one?" or "who had the highest score?" or "who has the best performance?". who is going to pay attention to the runner-ups???

maybe i am having too high expectation of myself. i thought i will be a person who 'score' but it is time to accept that i am a 'pass' person.

New year -- give thanks

new year had started, 10 days ago. i was so blessed, in the past 10 days with God's grace and blessings. things happened during this christmas and new year season and i remembered i did shared in youth fellowship last week about my new year. i said, i am celebrating a grey colour christmas but a red colour new year.

during the past 2 weeks, i really experienced the love and caring from God. when i was sad and my life was dull, God blessed me with 2 angles appearing. the angles are amazing and wonderful people who walk me through the valley in my life. they are both brother and sister who listen, support and comfort me when i feel really depressed. with their support, i was able to pack my emotions in a short period of time, stand up and continue my journey of life.

i think i need to learn to give thanks to the Lord and express my gratitude towards people around me. i realise that in the past, i was taking things for granted. like the caring from the brothers and sisters or friends and things mum and dad had provided for me. at least now i appreciate the presence of my dear angles.

in this new year, i tell myself i need to refocus. i use to focus on myself, rather than God. i was very concern on what i wanted to do, instead of what God wanted me to do for Him. i think i was dragged away from concentrating on God. i am like just woke up from a dream and then realise that how far i have been going off the track.

i will learn from my past, like what my angle had told me. he told me that the past is the main component that shape me to become who i am today. without the past, i may not be the one i am now. so, i'll learn from the past. although the past may contain a lot of mistakes and fool but the past is the best mirror to ensure i do not repeat mistakes and it makes me learn.

in this year, i hope i will become a servant to serve God in every opportunity. i'll walk the path which the Lord wants me to go and obey to Him.

Stay focus

should never lose focus
on what i am doing
if not,
life will become meaningless

always remember that
don't be like the church in Ephesus
never forsake
the passion and dreams
that i use to have

knowing that
a vase
need to be moulded
by the potter
before it becomes
beautiful and valuable
bare in mind
never surrender to challenges
no matter how tough they are

so, stay focus...

Update

came back from PD for 3 days already. haven't started anything except for sleep too hard. sleeping for the whole day since friday. don't find myself eager to start my revision for EOS. right noe i only have 7 days, 13 hours and 30 minutes left. i am sure this is not enough for me to revise especially BMS and holistic.

the only thing i can do is CONQUER myself. i am sure if i keep on finding reasons for myself to procrastinate, success will leave me.. and of course my 3.5 . oh nooo.... gonna do something about it.. ^^

~~~~
today finally went to the church in kota kemuning. i forgot the english name for the church but it is a pretty nice church. i mean the brothers and sisters and the pastor in-charge. but one thing bad is the church youths are not active. the youth and adult fellowship is freezing currently. i am thinking, how can i survive living in a church that don't have fellowships? not even cell groups. then i can onlt join for sunday service and not even sunday school. huh... this wil be tough for me because i need fellowship like what i had in my hometown church. a place for brothers and sisters with this age like me to mix and worship together. how??? what should i do? find a new church? join other church's fellowship? not joining fellowships? i wonder....

however, God had brought me to this church, i think He has His plan for me.. just pray hard and follow His will while He does the rest. that is what i learnt from today's sermon.

Life

Life, a precious gift given by God.
with a healthy body, we are able to live a great life.
nice food, the thing i enjoy the most.
the wonderful creation, which make me adore the awesome God.

but life can be taken away anytime,
maybe because of accident, disaster or disease.
and it can also be taken away,
just because of the nature cycle of human being,
going back to heaven,
to live in eternity.

appreciate life, and the health given by the Heavenly Father.
with all i have,
i'll do something, for the people who need help.
serve the community,
and let people know that there's someone who care for them.

~~~~
this afternoon, when i am working in the ward, i meet an old woman. she's 83 years old and she has a bad health condition. i am not sure about the medical diagnosis, but she has very low BP. both of her hand is on IV drip to give continuous medication so that her BP does not fall beyond the bod er line. and the worst things is she keep passing loose melaena stool. her condition is not positive, so we shifted her to the bed near the nurse counter.

later in the evening, i get a chance to do perineum care for her. her condition is far more negative than what i thought. the blood being passed out is a lot more than the stool. according to the I/O chart, she had passed 6 times of the malaena stool is the morning. the large amount of blood lost affects her BP. after the procedure, i am told by the staff nurse that the doc had declare that she's in DIL. her daughter all come and visit her, talk to her but she's too week to give any respond. i am so sad when i know nothing can be done for her recovery. i wish i can still see her tomorrow.. i pray....